That’s how I’d describe myself. I went to school, did exams, got good GCSEs and mediocre A-Levels. But most of my education took place at home, within our family. I can recall relatively little of what I learnt in school ie. what I memorised to pass my exams. On the other hand, the topics I had an extra-curricular interest in, that I was given the opportunity to explore outside of school, I remember huge amounts about. The biggest example would be the history of the Tudor period:
We had a video of Anne of the Thousand Days at home. I watched it over and over and over again. I loved it. I wanted to be Anne Boleyn. I wanted to wear her dresses; curtsey in them. My Mum used to take us to Hampton Court (when it didn’t cost an arm and a leg to get in!) very frequently; we sometimes travelled up to see the Tower of London. I remember having a Choose Your Own Adventure book (remember those?) about the Tudor period that I read over and over again. I learnt the order of Henry VIII’s wives and what became of them. All this I learnt outside of school. I started (but didn’t continue) collecting a children’s history magazine series that came with a cassette recording about two children who travelled back in time. I remember the salient parts of Elizabeth I’s speech during the time of the Spanish Armada because of listening to that tape. As I grew older, my Mum introduced me to the Jean Plaidy books, which I also devoured. I fell in love with the whole idea of Tudor times, but mostly the clothes the gentry wore, the beautiful, flowing gowns and headdresses. While I was at university, I used my spare time looking at websites about Tudor history and about Tudor costumes - the idea of wearing Tudor clothes was something that had always excited me. From the internet, and from friends I made via the internet (some of whom have been attending Kentwell for years), I taught myself the skills I needed to create an intire gentry-woman’s Tudor gown from scratch. Totally authentically (except for machine sewing!) - I even made a smock and a corset. It wasn’t perfect, but it was beautiful to me - and I could wear it!
I’m digressing slightly from my original topic. The point is that I learnt all this because my Mum educated us at home, even though she sent us to school. She took an interest in our lives; she took our interests seriously; she took us to places we were interested in; read to us; played with us; conversed with us; bought us things she thought we’d find interesting. I don’t think I was harmed by being in school but I do think it was a complete waste of time. My Mum is wonderful and amazing and I am not criticising her in anyway when I say that, when you think what I learnt about just one of the things I was interested in during the time I wasn’t in school, just think what I might have achieved if I hadn’t had to attend school at all! I didn’t meet my Dh at school. I’ve been out of nursing for too long to get a job without doing a return to practice course - a course that is running hardly anywhere in the country because we have (get this!!) too many nurses - so my degree is pretty useless. I’ve forgotten most of what I learnt at A-Level (physics, French and German), although I guess I’d pick up the languages quickly again if I had to - still, I suppose I’d learn them pretty quickly from scratch if I had to anyway! I didn’t need any exams to do my diploma. The job I’m doing now I could have done whether or not I’d done any of the exams I’ve done in my life and I’m loving it. It’s not a living, but I don’t have time to earn a living - my current career is child-rearing. I won’t go into detail about my Dh’s life but he would have quite easily managed without going to school as well and is in a good career with good pay and good prospects and didn’t need any of his qualifications to do it. His passions are bass guitar; triathlon; juggling/poi etc. - none of which he learnt in school.
I don’t intend to waste any of my children’s childhood by making them spend it in classrooms. If they spent the whole school day just playing or watching tv they could easily be just as ok as I am. If they spend it following up interests and being part of life, then they’ll be much better off than I am. So, am I worried about HE not being the right choice? No. From what I’ve read, the conversations I’ve had with adults about their time in school, my own experience, and the experiences of other parents with schooled and HE’d children, I think that, if parents are engaged with their children, enjoy being around them and providing opportunities to discover new interests and follow up old ones, school can be summed up as being, at worst, harmful and at best, a waste of time.
Edited to clarify: I don’t think that HE will mean the children don’t waste time…I also don’t mean that they would learn nothing in school. What I mean is that if HE children did nothing at all for 6 hours every day, 5 days a week, they may well not be any worse off than most schooled children and that there is little they can learn in school that they wouldn’t learn more easily at home…from my own experience 
Jim: “Ok advertising team, let’s see if we can use the fact that Jordan’s formula feeding her baby to get our formula advertised as much as possible. I think she’s due to do a shoot with OK! magazine. I’ve got contacts there - let’s start by getting an advert in right next to the article”
Anna: “But we’d be breaking the law if we put in an infant milk advert as it’s in the UK. At least we can get in a follow-on formula ad - we know from research that most mothers don’t distinguish between follow-on formula and first milk when it comes to advertising.”
Jim: “Is there anything else we could do, I wonder? Does Jordan use SMA?”
Dan: “Well she will if we send her some free samples! Let’s do that.”
Susan: “Great idea! Hang on, don’t you have contacts at OK!, Jim?”
Jim: “Yes - my girlfriend knows someone big on the features team”
Susan: “Do you think she’d be able to get them to help us out a bit? If we helped them *wink, wink*, if you know what I mean!”
Jim: “I’m sure they would…what were you thinking?”
Susan: “Well, if we got them to photograph Jordan lovingly bottle-feeding her baby, maybe they could make sure that the bottle was a ready-made SMA one - just a bit of subtle product placement. Then if the follow-on formula ad was on the next page…voila!”
Anna: “That’s a fantastic idea. And I’m pretty certain it doesn’t break the UK law - highly unethical, but who cares about that? Jordan unofficially promoting us could really give usa boost in the market.”
Dan: “Let’s hope that somewhere in the article she explains her reason for not breastfeeding - the more people glamourising formula feeding the better for us. And then all the readers will be automatically pointed to us as a company.”
Jim: “Let’s go for it - product placement in the photos, see if we can get the interviewer to lead Jordan a bit on the baby-feeding issue, and a huge full-page follow-on formula ad right next to the feature. Well done team!”
*This transcript is purely fictional and simply a guess at how SMA came up with the appallingly unethical formula promotion in the latest OK! Magazine. It could have happened in many other ways. Baby Milk Action are asking questions to find out whether Katie Price was involved or even aware, or how involved OK! Magazine were. See Mike Brady’s blog for more details.*
Now here is a government consultation that I know enough about to be able to produce a more thorough response than I managed for the HE one recently! The Government are reviewing UK Law on the marketing of breastmilk substitutes. Please watch this brilliant cartoon to see why this is so important to every mother and baby, not just breastfeeding ones.
The new regulations are not close enough to the World Health Organisation International Code of Marketing of Breastmilk Substitutes and, when I get a chance I’ll be recording here, and telling the Government in my response to the consultation, exactly why!
Edited to add: I can’t get the banner to work as a link to the website so here’s the link itself: http://www.babymilkaction.org/action/savephp/animation_php.html
OK magazine feature on the two of them with their new baby. Photo of Jordan bottle feeding her little girl. Peter Andre’s comment: “Junior didn’t breastfeed and he’s turned out fine.” A comment oft-heard but one along the same lines as “I never sat in a car seat as a baby and I turned out fine.” Why do some people find the concept of ’increased risk’ so difficult to understand? It doesn’t mean ‘if you do a then b will definitely happen’, it means ‘if you do a, then b is more likely to happen’. Of course the other thing with breastfeeding (and other things one does/eats as a baby/child) is that, while little Junior might be fine now, there are problems he is more likely to encounter in later life. I hate when I hear the ‘I/he/she turned out fine’ argument for not breastfeeding - it’s so daft! But hurrah! for Jordan, who is blatantly honest and just says “I don’t want a baby drinking from me. The thought of it makes me feel really funny. I think only a certain person could handle my knockers.” Yes, I feel sad that this woman’s life experiences so far have led her to see her breasts in this way, and only in this way, but she is showing that, in a way, she is empowered - she is confident enough to admit she doesn’t want to do it, and won’t feel guilty for her decision because it’s her decision and hasn’t been made for her by circumstances.
We’ve had running water for a couple of days now, but we can’t drink it, even if it’s boiled. So, although we can flush the loo and wash our clothes we still have to go to collect bottled water and fill up our carriers from the bowsers. Bit of a pain but nothing to really complain about.
What I really wanted to post about was a reply to a post on a parenting forum about toddlers having tantrums. It’s made me so angry but I can’t reply on the board as I’ll just get shot down in flames, I should think! She said that if the mother doesn’t stick to her guns, his tantrums will get worse. She said she used to pick up her child, take him away from wherever he was tantrumming and put them down. Or she’d “just laugh at him and humiliate him” so he wasn’t getting the reaction he wanted and she’d tell him she was going to “tell his friends how silly he looked and then take a pic”. All this is justified by the fact that if you don’t “let him know who is boss” he will try to control his mother. If the mother shows “him she means business now”, no matter how harsh she feels, it will make for a better homelife.
She didn’t mention that it would also mean a child learning to bury his feelings and emotions because he’s learnt that they are unimportant and ’silly’; a child who can’t trust that his mother will help him to cope with big feelings; a child who might worry for the rest of his life that expressing his emotions will lead to humiliation. Of all the ways to deal with tantrums, this has to be the worst I’ve ever heard of! Apart from smacking, of course.
Edited to add: Just to clarify, it wasn’t the taking the child to a different place that I took issue with (which I actually think is fairly sensible in some circumstances, particularly as I’ve noticed my own children lose their temper, get embarrassed that they’ve done it and that makes them lose it even more! Taking them somewhere private to help them calm down can really help.), but the deliberate humiliation tactic. I also am not flaming anyone for heat-of-the-moment reactions to distressing meltdowns - I know more than anyone that mothers often behave in ways they regret when in extreme situations! It’s the fact that this mother saw nothing wrong in doing this to her child :-( I do things all the time I *know* are wrong and I instantly regret them and try to change things so that I don’t do it again. I probably have even laughed at my own children by mistake when they’ve had a tantrum in an amusing way *but* I haven’t done it intentionally to humiliate them and I don’t think it is helpful - in fact I think it’s harmful and I would try not to do it IYSWIM.
I did my response to the proposed home education guidelines. The Freedom for Children to Grow website has more details and information about the guidelines and how to respond. I was respondent number 144. If you feel anything about the rights of parents to home educate their children the way they see fit, please respond to this consultation. The deadline is the end of this month (July 31).
The natural learning processes of babies and children is of endless fascination to me. Observing it makes me more and more keen on autonomous education and I feel very certain that we will continue our parenting philosophy of being led by our off-spring forever
Cotton-tail is currently learning how to eat solid foods. As regular readers of this blog will know, we unintentionally did ‘baby-led weaning’ with Flopsy (she refused anything off a spoon except yoghurt) and, having learnt more about it, did it on purpose with Mopsy. Cotton-tail is now 6.5 months and has been joining us at the table in her tripp trapp high-chair (no tray) for a few weeks (of course she’s been with us at mealtimes since she was born, but usually sleeping in someone’s arms or wriggling on someone’s lap). She is learning to eat in this way:
1. Learning how to pick up food, and, more specifically, learning how to pick up different types of food. She loves it that cucumber slides around and feels cold but that potato mashes up in her hand
2. Then she has learnt how to get it into her mouth. Her hand control has developed enough for her to make sure she picks the food up in such a way that there is enough food ‘visible’ to get some into her mouth. She is also starting to learn how to put food from one hand into another to make it more accessible.
3. Next she is learning how to bite pieces off what she’s got in her hand - a very pleasing experience, particuarly when every food does different things: Brocolli kind of breaks up into tiny little pieces which feel very interesting in her mouth; pasta feels slippery
4. Her current plan is to master the art of moving food around in her mouth with her tongue. Lots of gagging involved in this phase; and spitting food out onto the table, but she’s getting there.
5. The next thing she has to learn is how to mash the food up so it’s easy to swallow. We’re beginning to see less food on the floor after mealtimes so I’m guessing she’s doing this a little already. Her poos have yet to change, though, so she’s obviously not doing it very much!
The theory suggests that all this falls into place at about the same time her gut is ready to digest it all effectively and safely, when it’s less permeable to allergens and bacteria. I don’t need to worry about her lacking in nutrients due to the lack of solid food intake because she’s still breastfed on demand. If she’s anything like her sisters, by the time she gets to 8 or 9 months she’ll be eating food like her Daddy (albeit a bit messier!).
Mopsy is currently learning how to settle herself in the night. Flopsy is the only one of our babies to experience any sleep-training and that only consisted of a grand total of two minutes controlled crying and a week’s worth of patting/rocking to sleep at 5 months old in the misguided belief that it was bad for her to learn to fall asleep at the breast. When we stopped all that nonsense, life got much easier and, miraculously, Flopsy has been falling asleep without breastfeeding for at least 18 months and sleeping right through the night most nights; only needing a loo visit and a cuddle to settle if she does wake.
Mopsy is doing exactly what Flopsy did. Breastfeeding no longer gets her to sleep. It does switch her mind off and start the process, but the action of suckling now keeps her from falling fast asleep most of the time. So we feed, and then she rolls over and falls asleep herself while I cuddle her (when evenings work out well, that’s what happens - I won’t go into that whole thing now, though!). Most of the time when she wakes in the night (two or three times), she now rolls over mumbling a half-hearted request for a breastfeed (yak yak, she calls it) but falls asleep before I get to feed her.
The next step will be settling before she even asks for milk. However we’ve upset the process a bit now by decorating their room for them and pushing the two single beds together. They now both want to sleep in there, which is lovely for them. And it’s very pleasing to me to note that when Mopsy does wake, she doesn’t cry for me - she’s not scared of not sleeping next to me - she just calls ‘Mummy’ and me or DH go and get her and bring her back into our bed where she settles very quickly. It does mean that she’s woken up more than she would if she were stirring next to me so she does need feeding to get back to sleep.
When Flopsy did this, it was the start of the weaning process…maybe I’ll start thinking about weaning Mopsy but I don’t really feel like I want to like I did when Flopsy was this age. Mopsy is much happier than Flopsy was to have feeds that last a few seconds (more a cursory checking in with me, than an actual need to feed); and she doesn’t ask as much as Flopsy did. We’ll just see how it goes for now.
Flopsy is currently having a ‘learning to read’ phase. She’s had lots of these during her life so far. The early ones were things like a desire to learn her letters; or wanting to sit with me with a book and tell me her own version of the story; or asking me to point out the words in whatever book I’m reading and tell her what they say. At the moment she’s bringing books to us and asking us to read the words with her. Her favourite book ever is one she discovered a couple of years ago at the back of a bookcase. It’s called Daily Light and is a collection of Bible readings - one for every day of the year. Now no one could describe us as devoted Christians, but I’ve been brought up a Christian and my Grandparents would love it if we went to church regularly and read the Bible. They gave me this book when I was 15. It’s small - about 8cm wide; 13cm tall and 2cm thick and Flopsy has fallen in love with it. It has proper thin pages like a Bible has, which I think appeals to her. We’ve never read to her from it, so she has no idea what it says (I think!), but she loves it - ‘reads’ it when we’re reading our books in the evening etc. At the moment she often brings it to me asking me what the words say - she doesn’t want me to read it to her, but wants me to point to the words and if she knows them she reads them and if she doesn’t, I do.
She’s also very keen on reading one of the bedtime stories they choose every night and that’s really enjoyable. We have a collection of Puddle Lane books - mostly bought from car boot sales to satisify my nostalgia! - and she is also really enjoying reading those with me. I read the adult’s side of the page; then she reads the child’s side; then she gets bored and wants me to read it all.
These reading bouts take place randomly during the day and very frequently happen at 10pm when we’re reading in bed before going to sleep. Another reason to be glad she won’t be going to school - she can learn to read in her own time and whenever and whatever she likes
PS. All three girls are also learning heaps of other things all the time, of course, but these things seem to be what they’re focussing on at the moment.
Not sure how this post will turn out…I’m just going to go with my thoughts…
When I was first pregnant with Flopsy, I dutifully went to see my GP (as I was told to do by magazines and books) who said “congratulations - make an appointment to see the midwife”. When I got pregnant with Mopsy I did the same - good little girl that I am! Both times I came away wondering what the point had been. The GP hadn’t done a test, he’d just taken my word for it. Even if he had done a test, the home test kits are just as accurate as the ones they have at the surgery so it would have been a bit of a waste of money. So when I got pregnant with Cotton-tail I rang the surgery and asked for an appointment with the midwife. “Have you seen the Dr yet?” the nosy receptionist asked (not sure why I needed to write ‘nosy’ there - aren’t all drs receptionists nosy?). “No” I replied “Why?”. “Well you need to see the Dr to confirm that you are pregnant.” I refused and said “This is my third pregnancy - I can assure I am certainly pregnant. Isn’t it a bit of a waste of valuable surgery time for me to come in and be told something I know already? There’s no necessity for me to see the Dr at all - please make me an appointment with the midwife”. She saw sense, thank goodness, and made me one. But my story is not unusual. From the minute we conceive we are told by convention that we are not capable. We cannot even be trusted to know that we are pregnant without an all-seeing, all-knowing a fully trained Dr telling us that we are! This then leads onto us being told, implicitly, that we can’t be trusted to carry a baby to term. We need to have millions of tests to check we’re doing it well enough and if we’re not, well that’s ok - the state will step in and sort it all out for us. Before I go on, let me just make it clear that I am not bemoaning the provision of good antenatal care here. This post is about the fact that we are as close to being forced to conform as is humanly possible in a ‘democracy’ such as we live in. If we refuse tests we are frowned at and told that we’re irresponsible. We are punished repeatedly for this act of revolt by having it stamped across our notes for every health care professional (HCP) we come across to see and tell us off about. Having said that, I’ve been lucky enough to have mostly midwives and drs who believe in informed choice and in respecting informed choice even if it’s not what they’d choose. But I have been lucky - a lot of women are being ‘cared for’ by HCPs who are paternalistic - ‘they’ve done the training so they know best and anyone who thinks they know better are irresponsible’. So this all subconciously tells us we can’t manage without help - we are disempowered! How many women go to every single antenatal appointment they are given, have every single scan and every single blood test when they’re expecting their first baby?
Then the birth happens. We’re told it’s dangerous to birth our babies at home for various reasons. We are told that we won’t possibly be able to do it without help from midwives and drs. and all the wonderful equipment available in hospital. Never mind the fact that we have been able to birth our babies without it all since time began! That’s a huge subject to dissect, but the point is, we are still being disempowered - women truly don’t believe they have the power to birth a baby safely without help.
Then after our babies are born, our mothering skills are tested and checked up on by health visitors. Our ability to feed them is checked up on - not by asking us how we feel our babies are doing, but by weighing them! There is even a chart that health visitors refer to that tells them how well we’re doing as mothers. It has so much attention paid to it, that chart, despite the fact that there is so much research saying how badly it’s utilised and how there is far too much focus put on it. But still, it’s a good way for them to keep tabs on us incompetent mothers. I’ve heard mothers say ‘I kind of know he’s doing well - he’s happy, developing, filling out his clothes - but I like to go and get him weighed so I know for certain that he’s ok’. We don’t trust the evidence before our eyes and can’t believe we’re doing an ok job as a mother unless a HCP tells us so.
At some point in history, children started going to school. As more and more children did it, more and more people started to believe that all children should go to school. Then people started believing that children wouldn’t learn if they didn’t go to school. When I was a little girl, children went when they were five and were taught by teachers who could do pretty much what they wanted. Then they brought in the national curriculum and teachers were being implicitly told that they weren’t capable of teaching without interference from the powers that be. Well if that’s the case, then certainly parents can’t possibly be capable of ensuring their children are educated! Then they brought in ‘reception year’ for 4 year olds. Not compulsory at all, but of course more and more children started to go and now it is nearly unheard-of for children to wait to attend school until they’re 5. Because of course parents can’t possibly be trusted to educate their children once they get to 4 years old, can they? Actually, they can’t really be trusted to do that even once their children reach 3 years old, hence the free nursery places for three year old children, and the national curriculum for babies and toddlers. Parents themselves now don’t believe they’re capable of caring for their children once they hit 3 years old. The disempowerment is creeping into every facet of our parenting lives and it’s been getting worse and worse. I once read a post on a parenting forum from a mum of a 2-year-old who had been working but now was facing the prospect of being a stay-at-home-mum unable to afford nursery fees - she was very concerned that she wouldn’t be able to teach him what he needed to know and was asking for ideas as to how to teach him his numbers etc. This was not an unusual post! Parents really don’t trust themselves any more and that’s because the government doesn’t trust them.
This is quite a rambling post - sorry about that! Anyway, what I’m about to ramble onto now is my feelings about breastfeeding and empowerment. I believe that women’s belief in their ability to mother their babies can be damaged even further if they don’t succeed at breastfeeding. The reason I believe this is because of how I have noticed that when women who have not managed to birth their babies without help have found successful breastfeeding incredibly healing and they talk about their immense pride that they’re babies have grown and thrived because of their milk. This is not to say that mothers who don’t breastfeed don’t have the same ability to mother! What I wonder is if they have a less robust subconcious belief in their ability to mother. Whether they are more disempowered…? I would love to see a study into this, although how it would be done I have no idea! I am not as interested as you might imagine in getting babies breastfed. I am trained to be mother-centred and to focus on empowering mothers because how e nurture our babies is the main focus of the beginning of our parenting careers and if we feel empowered at the beginning, perhaps we continue to feel empowered and capable and more trusting of our instincts and innate ability to mother. So another reason for supporting breastfeeding supporters (not breastfeeding promoters - breastfeeding promotion is disempowering).
Of course, I don’t think breastfeeding isn’t the be-all-and-end-all, but it is often the starting point. The endless testing and direction and taking-over of parenting by the state, in my opinion, filters down to our children. By sending them to school, we (and their teachers) imply that they are not capable of learning without someone teaching them. By making them eat what and when we say so (or rather when the books/health visitors/whatever say so), we imply that they are not capable of regulating their own food intake. By forcing them to sleep at set times of the day (because that is what we are told we ought to do), we imply that they are not capable of going to sleep when they’re tired. I could go on. The fact is that everyone in the world has different experiences that everyone else. Everyone has different knowledge. We ought to be sharing that knowledge and experience but not telling other people what to do based on it or we rob them of the chance of gaining their own knowledge and experience - we disempower them and they go on to disempower others.
Again, apologies for the rambling nature of this post - these thoughts have been roaming my head for weeks now, waiting for an opportunity to be blogged about. And of course my children won’t do as their told and sit quietly while I concentrate 
There’s loads more to say/write about this subject
I often come across the belief that my passion for breastfeeding is just that - a passion, an interest, something I’ve enjoyed. But it’s not. It’s so much more than that. Breastfeeding is a desperately important social, political and economical issue and not enough people understand that. There are two good books I’d recommend people to read to illustrate this - The Politics of Breastfeeding by Gabrielle Palmer and Milk, Money and Madness by Naomi Baumslag (there are others on the subject but these, in my opinion, are the most succinct), but, if you don’t have time to read whole books, try this Guardian article for starters.
Try this:
Twenty-five years ago, when Dr Iqbal Kabir first came to work at this [diarrhoea hospital in Bangladesh], small babies were almost unknown as patients. Today, he says, infants make up as many as 70% of admissions.
The reason? Kabir shakes his head, and points to a poster on the wall above Eti’s bed. The same poster is displayed, many times, around the ward. It shows a baby’s bottle, with a big cross drawn heavily through it. The message is clear. “Bottlefeeding is harmful,” says Kabir. “Because bottlefed babies get diarrhoea, since their formula is mixed with dirty water and since their bottles are not sterile. Do you know how many breastfed babies are admitted here with diarrhoea? The number is almost zero.”
Or:
“The [artificial baby milk company] reps are very aggressive - there are three or four companies, and they come in every two weeks or so,” he says. “Their main aim is to recommend their product. Sometimes they bring gifts - Nestlé brought me a big cake at new year. Some companies give things like pens and notebooks, with their brand name on them. They try very hard - even though they know I am not interested, that I always recommend breastfeeding, still they come.”
Or:
“Nur has been fed on Lactogen [made by Nestle] from the outset, but his formula, she says, costs her and her husband Gias, who works in a mustard-dyeing factory, around 800 taka (£2) a week. And if that doesn’t sound much, set it against the fact that Gias earns only £6 a week. “We can’t afford it at all,” says Happi, shaking her head. “The milk uses up all our money.”
Or:
According to Save the Children’s report, infant mortality in Bangladesh alone could be cut by almost a third - saving the lives of 314 children every day - if breastfeeding rates were improved.
So it’s not just a hobby, it’s not just a whim of mine to support breastfeeding - IT SAVES LIVES!!! That’s why I’m passionate about it.
I dislike Breastfeeding Awareness Week (BFAW) for several reasons, believe it or not. One of the reasons is the sudden emergence of millions of newspaper articles like this one in the Mail on Sunday. The authors bemoan the way that the DoH and breastfeeding organisations ‘force’ women to breastfeed but the truth is that these mothers’ sad stories have nothing to do with the relentless pushing of breastfeeding by the DoH and everything to do with the appalling level of support from the NHS. The NCT, LLL and Unicef are trying to improve that support by trying to provide education for NHS Health Professionals (training that is, appallingly, not officially a part of midwifery or health visitor training!) and by providing highly trained Breastfeeding Counsellors and Supporters who volunteer their time to help women let down by their care-givers. These articles just attack the only people available for skilled breastfeeding support when they ought to be attacking the government for pushing the ‘breast is best’ message (a slogan that is disliked and never used by most BFCs) without providing the necessary support for it.
The other reason I don’t like BFAW is, as you may have gathered from the above, is because I totally disagree with breastfeeding promotion. What we should be working towards is protecting breastfeeding, not promoting it. Protection of breastfeeding will help more women succeed in their choice to breastfeed, which will result in mothers feeling more empowered and believing in their ability to nurture their own babies themselves. More women succeeding at breastfeeding means more breastfeeding being visible which will hopefully lead to a cultural change of seeing breastfeeding as more the norm. Stopping promoting breastfeeding so heavily will also help the allay some of the negative feelings of guilt many mothers have when they stop breastfeeding (which is usually because of not having enough support, not out of choice - statistics suggest that a whopping 90% of mothers who give up breastfeeding do so sooner than they would have wanted! In my (limited, I admit!) experience, women who give up because they actually *want* to, not because they feel they have no choice, do not feel guilty about their decision). Protection of breastfeeding, in my opinion, involves everything the Breastfeeding Manifesto endorses. If you agree with me, please pledge your support by signing up yourself and by contacting your MP to ask them to do the same.
While I’m at it, I’d just like to say that I am truly shocked by the above article author’s description of her NCT Breastfeeding Workshop. No BFC I know would have even asked whether or not the parents were bfed, let alone asked such direct and offensive questions of a bottle-fed person…I wonder where that comment has come from? I’m sure she’s not lying, but I am well aware that sometimes strong feelings about a subject can warp one’s understanding of what someone’s saying - I hope that’s the right explanation!
